My novel is a work of fiction that is informed by my personal experiences and perspectives. In my first career, I was an adoption consultant. I never forgot my clients—not the couples, not the adoptees, and especially not the birth parents. I carried their stories with me, as well as the knowledge that our brief time together changed all our futures.
Zelly Ruskin – 19 October 2024
The Back Flap
Billie Campbell, a Massachusetts adoption specialist grappling with fertility issues, dreams of adopting a baby, but not just any baby—her pregnant client’s baby. While her longing threatens to send her down a dark path, her husband, Tyler, is keeping secrets: he’s full of doubts about becoming a father, and he’s also trying to figure out who is sending him upsetting anonymous texts and photos. On the other side of town, Anne, a woman scarred by childhood abuse, obsesses with a second chance at becoming a family with the two people she regrets ever having let go of: the baby she gave up for adoption twenty years ago and the man of her dreams.
Their lives become entangled when the client’s newborn is abducted, and Billie becomes a prime suspect.
Amid the chaos unleashed by the abduction, Tyler uncovers a link between the person tormenting him and the abduction—but now Billie has disappeared too. The race to find both her and the baby is on; but will they find them before it’s too late?
About the book
What is the book about?
Not Yours to Keep is about an infertile adoption specialist who dreams about adopting her pregnant client’s baby, her husband who is keeping secrets, and a woman haunted by childhood abuse obsessed with creating a life with the two people she regrets losing the most: the baby she gave up for adoption, and the man of her dreams.
When did you start writing the book?
The idea for the book brewed in my head for years, but I actually put pen to paper in 2018.
How long did it take you to write it?
I completed the first draft during a twelve-week novel writing workshop. It got sidelined by a medical issue, and then any traction on the developmental editing got waylaid by the Covid pandemic. So, all in all it took about four years.
Where did you get the idea from?
The idea for Not Yours to Keep originated with a photograph. I was in a long-term relationship that had run well past its expiration date (that’s a story for a future book). One day I found this photograph, and when I asked about it, he told a ridiculous lie. What’s funny is the lie didn’t faze me. I just kept looking at the photo, thinking, there’s a great plot in there somewhere. Years later, I drew inspiration from that photo, my early career in adoption and personal experience with fertility, to develop a narrative in which the characters face morally questionable choices.
Were there any parts of the book where you struggled?
The story is told from multiple POVs, so structure and character development were challenging. I was many drafts in before it found its rhythm between which character came first, and determining the story needed to be told in the present.
What came easily?
Though my work in the field was long ago, I found I could still tap into and easily write about the complex and emotional world of adoption as I experienced it.
Are your characters entirely fictitious or have you borrowed from real world people you know?
My novel is a work of fiction that is informed by my personal experiences and perspectives. In my first career, I was an adoption consultant. I never forgot my clients—not the couples, not the adoptees, and especially not the birth parents. I carried their stories with me, as well as the knowledge that our brief time together changed all our futures. Not Yours to Keep is a sharing of the tremendous and lasting impact of my time in the adoption field.
We all know how important it is for writers to read. Are there any particular authors that have influenced how you write and, if so, how have they influenced you?
I’ve always loved reading, but since discovering how much fun it is to write suspense, my shelves are heavy with domestic thrillers. Ironically, as a loyal reader of her work, I always thought my stories would be Danielle Steel-esque. Instead, I’ve been told my writing is reminiscent of Liane Moriarty and Gillian Flynn. It’s an enormous compliment. However, I think my writing style blends the works of Mary Higgins Clark and Faye Kellerman—entertaining and suspenseful, with a sensitive exploration of difficult, thought-provoking issues.
Do you have a target reader?
This book’s target audience is adult readers (18 and over) interested in a blend of women’s fiction and suspense.
About Writing
Do you have a writing process? If so can you please describe it?
I’m a complete pantser with a deep case of plotter envy. I’m full of plot ideas and one usually sticks out and intrigues me. The story germinates in my head for a good long while until I know where the plot should go, and then I attempt to make sense of it on a page. Ideally, I like to write every day.
Do you outline? If so, do you do so extensively or just chapter headings and a couple of sentences?
I’ll pen my ideas on paper first. It’s chicken scratch and twirls around the page in a ferocious mess. But something about the process helps formulate it more clearly before it gets typed in a Word document as the first of many drafts.
Do you edit as you go or wait until you’ve finished?
I edit as I go. I don’t recommend it, as it slows the process down considerably. On the upside, by the end of a draft, I know every word and action of every scene without looking.
Do you listen to music while you write? If yes, what gets the fingers tapping?
On the best days, I write in silence and let the characters and world I’m building become the sounds and music in my head. When I’m editing, then I’m likely to listen to Jazz.
About Publishing
Did you submit your work to Agents?
Yes. I submitted to agents. A lot of them. Like many new authors, I submitted too early. I knew the manuscript wasn’t ready, and the agents saw it too.
What made you decide to go Indie, whether self-publishing or with an indie publisher? Was it a particular event or a gradual process?
After the heartache of query rejection, I rewrote the book and set out to query again. But this time, based on recommendations from some author friends, I included hybrid publishers in my pursuit. Self-publishing wasn’t something I considered because I lacked the education, experience, and the confidence for it. Going the traditional route, via querying, my book’s future depended on many subjective variables. Hybrid offered the best blend of traditional and self-publishing. Having a professional team vet my novel, guide and advise me through the process turned out to be the perfect route for me.
Did you get your book cover professionally done or did you do it yourself?
My publisher, She Writes Press, has an art director who handles the book covers in-house, and they always do an exceptional job.
Do you have a marketing plan for the book or are you just winging it?
Yes, to both. I studied as much as I could on book marketing, watched a ton of webinars and took part in a fantastic launch & marketing program. I came away with a solid and organized plan. Yet, still, some days I throw spaghetti at the wall and tease out what works.
Any advice that you would like to give to other newbies considering becoming Indie authors?
Build a community of other Indie authors. Taking this path means a lot of work and challenges, but the support and knowledge you share with others will propel you through it. Most of all, believe in yourself and your book.
About You
Where did you grow up?
I grew up in Westchester County, about forty minutes north of NYC.
Where do you live now?
New York City
What would you like readers to know about you?
I have a quirky, snarky, and sometimes serious perspective on some not so average life experiences. Writing twisty plots is my passion, but I am also an avid volunteer for brain aneurysm awareness.
What are you working on now?
Currently, I’m working on a new twist of a woman who contemplates the murder of her greedy, gaslighting husband.
End of Interview:
For more from Zelly Ruskin visit her website and follow her on Instagram.
Get your copy of Not Yours to Keep from Amazon US.