Opening up and being vulnerable can be challenging, but it is also rewarding, and looking back, it has helped me connect with readers.

Chrissy Holm – 26 November 2023

The Back Flap

The church has a lot of views on women’s relationships. Respect the sanctity of marriage. Save yourself for your husband. Never, ever think about a wife.

Homeschooled at church and raised by a devout father, Chrissy internalized scripture’s strictest messages. She suppressed her bisexuality and followed all the teachings of purity culture.

When she turned sixteen, her parent’s divorce flipped the script.

Devastated and unsure of her values, Chrissy jumped from one relationship to another, searching for commitment and solace from a depression that crept more to the forefront every day.

More a triumphant love memoir than a religious trauma book, Chrissy Holm thoughtfully unpacks her sexuality, faith, and mental health with achingly relatable vulnerability and insight.

Readers who grew up in evangelical or fundamentalist religious communities will find themselves in these stories as Chrissy seeks meaning in her religious upbringing—finding forgiveness for her dad, her past relationships, and ultimately, herself.

Raw and hopeful, this liberating memoir is an intimate look at how one woman found the courage to question what she was taught to believe to uncover her own truth and navigate love with pride.

About the book

What is the book about?

Finding Sunlight is about my journey of unpacking my sexuality, faith, and mental health. Being homeschooled at my church and raised by a devout father, I internalized the church’s messages, followed the teaching of purity culture, such as abstinence before marriage, and suppressed my bisexuality. When my parents’ divorce flipped the script, I was devastated and unsure of my values, jumping from relationship to relationship in search of solace. It’s about finding the courage to question what I was taught to believe to uncover my own truth and navigate love with pride.

When did you start writing the book?

I started writing Finding Sunlight in September 2018 after a hiking trip in the Grand Tetons.

How long did it take you to write it?

It took me over three and a half years to write the memoir, but then, with editing, revising, and proofreading tweaks during the publishing process, it added up to five years.

Where did you get the idea from?

I’m not sure it was one central idea or situation from which I got the idea, but after hiking in the Grand Tetons, I said I wanted to dedicate myself to writing a book. I explored different writing classes and events like NaNoWriMo, attended writing conferences, and joined a Memoir and Narrative Writing class. When I started focusing on this story, I had a small scene expressing my love of sunflowers. The story solidified in my mind during one of my writer group feedback sessions. Their feedback was to emphasize the sunflower metaphor I briefly started, which helped give me a backbone of structure and ultimately helped me process some struggles I had throughout my life. It blossomed from there, so to speak.

Were there any parts of the book where you struggled?

Yes, I definitely struggled with some parts of the book. With it being a memoir, it was hard to be vulnerable about some aspects of the story. For example, when I wrote some more challenging scenes, I kept it surface level and reflected only a little on what I thought or felt. As I got more feedback from my writing groups, I knew if I was ready to tell that part of the story, I had to get deeper and more reflective on what I was thinking and feeling. If I wasn’t ready to tell that part of the story, I had to cut it. Opening up and being vulnerable can be challenging, but it is also rewarding, and looking back, it has helped me connect with readers.

What came easily?

I loved the revising part of the process. While getting feedback from people can be daunting, it is always necessary and can help shape the story and make it better. I enjoyed going through and rewriting parts and expanding them, adding more depth, and chiseling out the scenes.

Are your characters entirely fictitious or have you borrowed from real world people you know?

All of the characters are real. I changed a majority of their names and some identifying information, but other than that, everything is real.

We all know how important it is for writers to read. Are there any particular authors that have influenced how you write and, if so, how have they influenced you?

Reading is SO crucial to writing. I found that I was able to write more and get into a flow state when I read more, which you might think is counterintuitive to time. I wouldn’t say there were specific authors, but it was a compilation of writers from Angie Thomas to Tara Westover to Cheryl Strayed. During the last five years, I’ve read a LOT of memoirs, writing craft books, young adult books, and self-help books.

Do you have a target reader?

My target reader is either young adults questioning their sexuality or people who grew up in evangelical or fundamentalist religious communities.

About Writing

Do you have a writing process? If so can you please describe it?

My writing process is messy, but I usually put as much as I can on paper and limit editing until later as much as possible. That doesn’t always happen, but I’m always reminding myself to explode things on a page, and I can always whittle down later. One of the best writing words of wisdom I received was you can’t edit a blank page, and I’ll never forget that.

Do you outline? If so, do you do so extensively or just chapter headings and a couple of sentences?

I’ve tried outlining, and sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t. With Finding Sunlight specifically, I wrote what I called “clips,” which are essentially little scenes (vignettes) or memories I had. They didn’t flow with the rest of the story until later. I think when I write more stories in the future, I may outline some more to help with structure, but it’ll be minimal, like a couple of sentences, to get my head wrapped around the story.

Do you edit as you go or wait until you’ve finished?

As much advice as I’ve been told not to edit as I go, I am definitely guilty of doing that. I tend to write better when I don’t, so it’s always a work in progress to remember to just keep writing.

Did you hire a professional editor?

Yes, my publisher Wise Ink, paired me up with Emily Krempholtz, who was a great fit and amazing! She really helped shape and transform many sections.

Do you listen to music while you write? If yes, what gets the fingers tapping?

Absolutely! It helps so much. I usually listen to classical or something without lyrics. It’s also helpful for me to be in a coffee shop or library, somewhere with a chatter ambiance, and others are working, typing, or writing.

About Publishing

Did you submit your work to Agents?

Yes, I did submit Finding Sunlight to agents. I pitched to a handful during conferences, and many requested partial or full manuscript reads.

What made you decide to go Indie, whether self-publishing or with an indie publisher? Was it a particular event or a gradual process?

My decision to go with a hybrid publisher was a gradual process. Pitching to agents was eye-opening, but I realized I wanted to get my story out there sooner because there was no guarantee after getting signed on with an agent. I was interested in learning more about the publishing process and industry, so it would be a good opportunity to learn with the support of people who work every day. Not everyone has access to the resources or privilege to do it, so I acknowledge and appreciate this opportunity I could have.

Did you get your book cover professionally done or did you do it yourself?

Yes, the book cover was professionally done by Kimberly Glyder. She did an excellent job and really captured the overarching story of Finding Sunlight.

Do you have a marketing plan for the book or are you just winging it?

As of right now, it’s a combination of both. I have ideas of conferences and events I want to attend to help market the book. But I also know this will be a learning curve, and there are some things I need to “wing” and learn along this journey.

Any advice that you would like to give to other newbies considering becoming Indie authors?

It’s hard work! Much more challenging than I even imagined and publishing a book is not for the faint of heart. Yes, I imagine some aspects are easier than in the past, but be prepared for a rollercoaster of emotions and the time and energy it takes. I found that it’s crucial to find support from loved ones to other writers. That makes the difference from “I want to write a book” to “I published a book.”

About You

Where did you grow up?

I grew up in Cottage Grove, Minnesota—a town of 30,000+.

Where do you live now?

I live in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

What would you like readers to know about you?

I’m super passionate about helping others tell their stories – whether in book form, podcast, or anything in between. I also want to write more books! I’m glad memoir was my first step into this world of publishing, and there may be more in the future, but I’m excited to step into other stories too, fiction and beyond.

What are you working on now?

Finishing the last publishing touches on Finding Sunlight–writing interviews such as this, podcasting (being a guest and hosting my own show, Stirred by Words), and all the things that go into promoting the book. In the back of my head, I’m also percolating on the next idea for a new book. I’m excited for what’s to come!

End of Interview:

For more from Chrissy Holm visit her website.

Get your copy of Finding Sunlight from Amazon US or Amazon UK.