That was my secret plan. I knew I was going to be a self-published author one day, so I shopped around for illustrators and married one. (Kidding! I was really hoping for an editor.)

Laurie Boris – 7 May 2013

The Back Flap

Landing in the emergency room nearly unconscious from pneumonia, sixty-five-year-old Estelle Trager is forced to admit that she’s been living with potentially malignant tumors in both breasts…for five years. Now her son Adam and his wife, Liza, know about her deadly secret. Adam is hurt and outraged to learn that his mother had intended to take this to her grave. But Estelle, who watched her mother and grandmother suffer from breast cancer in the days when no one dared speak its name, has no intention of putting her family or herself through the horrors of cancer treatment. Estelle decides there is only one solution: ask Liza, the thirty-three-year-old daughter-in-law she once called a godless hippie raised by wolves, to kill her.

A horrified Liza refuses and keeps the request—among other things—a secret from her furious husband. But she tells his charismatic younger brother, Charlie, a close friend from college with whom she shares her own confidences, despite Adam’s serious case of sibling rivalry. Armed with nutrition textbooks and her neighbor, a savvy nurse, can Liza win over her mother-in-law and convince her to consider other options before the cancer, the secrets, and Estelle’s determination to end her life win out?

About the book

What is the book about?

Don’t Tell Anyone is about a family who has just discovered that their matriarch, venerable Jewish mother Estelle Trager, not only has advanced breast cancer but knew about it and had intended to take it to her grave. Now that her secret’s out, she feels the only solution is to ask her daughter-in-law, Liza, whom she’d once called a godless hippie raised by wolves, to kill her.

When did you start writing the book?

It began as a NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) project in November 2004. The first one I ever tried. It’s a totally crazy process, but one I’d recommend every writer try at least once.

How long did it take you to write it?

I completed the first, skeletal, 50,000-word draft over that month. After I let it sit for a while, I fleshed it out over several years and many, many drafts.

Where did you get the idea from?

My mother-in-law tried to conceal her breast cancer, not out of any kind of malice or passive suicidal intent, I now believe, but out of fear that she was unequipped to handle the treatment. When a medical emergency of a different stripe “outed” her, she was about one notch from untreatable, and required aggressive action. It was a shocking, painful time for our family. As the daughter-in-law, I was rushing around so much during that period, seeing to everyone else’s comfort, that I never got to spend too much time processing why she made the choice she did. This book was an effort to help me understand. I gave the situation to a fictional family and let them fight it out. But I didn’t want to write the “traditional” cancer journey. Many other authors have done it so well. So I tipped it over a bit. What would a family do with a loved one who is hell-bent against treatment? What would it take to convince her to give survival a chance?

Were there any parts of the book where you struggled?

I’m laughing as I think of this because my writing group frequently criticized all the arguing that went on during the story. I don’t handle anger very well in my personal life. In fact, I’m pretty horrible at it. I want to run off and hide until the shouting stops. So it was really tough for me to just let a character marinate in his or her rage and even occasionally explode.

What came easily?

The dialogue. It’s always what I hear first, what I feel most comfortable writing. And I was surprised that Estelle’s memories came so easily, as if she were whispering them to me.

Are your characters entirely fictitious or have you borrowed from real world people you know?

I borrowed a smidge from my late mother-in-law for Estelle: her health situation, mainly. And like Estelle, she was a bitty little thing, smoked like a fiend, and made a mean pot of chicken soup. The neighbors began as an amalgam of the great people in my own neighborhood. If I ever had to live off the grid, I’d starve. Fortunately, I have people within shouting distance who own tools, know how to fix things, and accept six-packs, pizza, and heartfelt gratitude in return.

We all know how important it is for writers to read. Are there any particular authors that have influenced how you write and, if so, how have they influenced you?

John Irving, Anne Tyler, Joyce Carol Oates, Ian McEwan, and TC Boyle are my contemporary favorites and probably the authors who have influenced my writing the most. I’ve edited more than a few Oates-like sentences out of my early novels. She’s monstrously talented. After reading two of her novellas, Black Water and Zombie, I wanted to applaud. John Irving blends humor into dark subjects in a way I really admire and strive for. TC Boyle and McEwan make me want to raise the bar on my own writing because they make literary fiction accessible and write such terrific, flawed characters.

Do you have a target reader?

Someone who appreciates a thoughtful book he or she won’t immediately forget after the last page. I have a particular person in mind when I write, someone who has read my work for years, even the early attempts. I want to write a story he’ll enjoy.

About Writing

Do you have a writing process? If so can you please describe it?

I don’t write every day but strive for “touching” my work-in-progress at least a few times a week. Early mornings are best. Rather than seeing a scene develop in my head, I hear the characters talking, and let them tell me the story. This is probably why my early drafts read like rough screenplays. Sometimes I use guided meditation or character interviews to get me deeper into the story and the characters’ heads. I fill in the gaps and add setting and description in subsequent drafts, which I share with a critique group. This is probably why it takes me so long to finish a novel.

Do you outline? If so, do you do so extensively or just chapter headings and a couple of sentences?

I blob the whole first draft out first. Then I outline. I’ll summarize each scene on index cards and mush them around until a story takes shape, marking what needs to be cut, added, or moved.

Do you edit as you go or wait until you’ve finished?

I try very hard to kick that critic off my shoulder as I’m writing the first draft. Sometimes I even type with my eyes closed. When I’m done, I’ll edit.

Did you hire a professional editor?

Yes, for the final draft. The biggest misconception about editors is that their own writing is perfect without outside help. I still miss things, especially as I read the story for the fifth, sixth, seventh, twenty-ninth time.

Do you listen to music while you write? If yes, what gets the fingers tapping?

A little instrumental music —Miles Davis, Radiohead, others—is soothing while I edit my own work. When I write, however, I need complete silence to hear the characters. I’ve even resorted to earplugs.

About Publishing

Did you submit your work to Agents?

I did, for my first few novels. I shopped my first one around before it was ready. I was too inexperienced and too drunk on my own excitement to know that, however. Nearly 150 agent rejections later, I learned a few things.

What made you decide to go Indie, whether self-publishing or with an indie publisher? Was it a particular event or a gradual process?

After writing for almost twenty years and trying to place my novels through traditional channels, I had to face a few facts about the marketplace versus what I love to write. My work is what is sometimes charitably called “quirky.” Which is often translated by agents into, “I can’t sell this.” I’d all but given up trying to sell my manuscripts when a small press gave one of my favorite stories a chance. After that, I gave self-publishing a try. I wanted to see if I could do it. I loved the idea of having total control over my product. This teamed up very well with a story that was too close to my heart to let anyone change a word.

Did you get your book cover professionally done or did you do it yourself?

My husband, an illustrator and web designer, did the cover. He’s designed all my covers. That was my secret plan. I knew I was going to be a self-published author one day, so I shopped around for illustrators and married one. (Kidding! I was really hoping for an editor.)

Do you have a marketing plan for the book or are you just winging it?

I have a rough marketing plan. Because of the touchy subject matter in Don’t Tell Anyone, I’m angling toward book clubs, personal appearances, blog posts where I invite discussion, sometimes even one-on-one conversations. But I’m always looking for new opportunities.

Any advice that you would like to give to other newbies considering becoming Indie authors?

Try not to forget why you started writing in the first place. This is why I love challenges like NaNoWriMo; it brings me back to my roots. It’s so easy to get caught up in author ranks, sales figures, what everyone else is doing, what your website looks like, if enough people are following you on social media. Sure, most of that stuff is important, since no one else is doing it for us (unless you have a decent budget for a publicist.) But if you let the craziness consume too much time and energy, you’re not getting the next book done. You’re not doing the vital work of editing and revising to make it the best product you can. You could lose sight of the passion and spark that made you want to sneak away nearly every waking moment to write your stories. And that will show in your work.

About You

Where did you grow up?

I spent my childhood in Hopewell Junction, New York, a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it town near a major IBM installation. It was tough to make friends because their families kept getting transferred. “IBM” grew to stand for “I’ve Been Moved.” So I read a lot of books.

Where do you live now?

Ironically, after all these years of moving about, I now live an hour away from my birthplace, near Woodstock. It’s a beautiful area, right between the Catskill Mountains and the Hudson River.

What would you like readers to know about you?

I like to make people laugh and I joke around a lot. You might not know that from some of my books.

What are you working on now?

Another contemporary novel, this time set in the backdrop of the weight loss industry, a subject near and dear to, well, a little lower than my heart. This is the one I’ve spent years trying to convince myself not to write. So…now I have to. I’ve triple-dog-dared myself.

End of Interview:

For more from Laurie visit her website, follow her on twitter, or like her page on facebook. You can also find Laurie’s take on books, publishing, and the life of an author  in her frequents posts on Indies Unlimited.

Get your copy of Don’t Tell Anyone from Amazon US (paper or ebook), Amazon UK, (paper or ebook), Barnes & Noble, or Smashwords.